Why have you been so successful in reaching some of your goals, but not others? If you aren’t sure, you are far from alone in your confusion. It turns out that even brilliant, highly accomplished people are pretty lousy when it comes to understanding why they succeed or fail. The intuitive answer — that you are born predisposed to certain talents and lacking in others — is really just one small piece of the puzzle. In fact, decades of research on achievement suggests that successful people reach their goals not simply because of who they are, but more often because of what they do.
1. Get specific. When you set yourself a goal, try to be as specific as possible. "Lose 5 pounds" is a better goal than "lose some weight," because it gives you a clear idea of what success looks like. Knowing exactly what you want to achieve keeps you motivated until you get there. Also, think about the specific actions that need to be taken to reach your goal. Just promising you’ll "eat less" or "sleep more" is too vague — be clear and precise. "I’ll be in bed by 10pm on weeknights" leaves no room for doubt about what you need to do, and whether or not you’ve actually done it.
2. Seize the moment to act on your goals. Given how busy most of us are, and how many goals we are juggling at once, it’s not surprising that we routinely miss opportunities to act on a goal because we simply fail to notice them. Did you really have no time to work out today? No chance at any point to return that phone call? Achieving your goal means grabbing hold of these opportunities before they slip through your fingers.
To seize the moment, decide when and where you will take each action you want to take, in advance. Again, be as specific as possible (e.g., "If it’s Monday, Wednesday, or Friday, I’ll work out for 30 minutes before work.") Studies show that this kind of planning will help your brain to detect and seize the opportunity when it arises, increasing your chances of success by roughly 300%.
3. Know exactly how far you have left to go. Achieving any goal also requires honest and regular monitoring of your progress — if not by others, then by you yourself. If you don’t know how well you are doing, you can’t adjust your behavior or your strategies accordingly. Check your progress frequently — weekly, or even daily, depending on the goal.
4. Be a realistic optimist. When you are setting a goal, by all means engage in lots of positive thinking about how likely you are to achieve it. Believing in your ability to succeed is enormously helpful for creating and sustaining your motivation. But whatever you do, don’t underestimate how difficult it will be to reach your goal. Most goals worth achieving require time, planning, effort, and persistence. Studies show that thinking things will come to you easily and effortlessly leaves you ill-prepared for the journey ahead, and significantly increases the odds of failure.
5. Focus on getting better, rather than being good. Believing you have the ability to reach your goals is important, but so is believing you can get the ability. Many of us believe that our intelligence, our personality, and our physical aptitudes are fixed — that no matter what we do, we won’t improve. As a result, we focus on goals that are all about proving ourselves, rather than developing and acquiring new skills.
Fortunately, decades of research suggest that the belief in fixed ability is completely wrong — abilities of all kinds are profoundly malleable. Embracing the fact that you can change will allow you to make better choices, and reach your fullest potential. People whose goals are about getting better, rather than being good, take difficulty in stride, and appreciate the journey as much as the destination.
6. Have grit. Grit is a willingness to commit to long-term goals, and to persist in the face of difficulty. Studies show that gritty people obtain more education in their lifetime, and earn higher college GPAs. Grit predicts which cadets will stick out their first grueling year at West Point. In fact, grit even predicts which round contestants will make it to at the Scripps National Spelling Bee.
The good news is, if you aren’t particularly gritty now, there is something you can do about it. People who lack grit more often than not believe that they just don’t have the innate abilities successful people have. If that describes your own thinking …. well, there’s no way to put this nicely: you are wrong. As I mentioned earlier, effort, planning, persistence, and good strategies are what it really takes to succeed. Embracing this knowledge will not only help you see yourself and your goals more accurately, but also do wonders for your grit.
7. Build your willpower muscle. Your self-control "muscle" is just like the other muscles in your body — when it doesn’t get much exercise, it becomes weaker over time. But when you give it regular workouts by putting it to good use, it will grow stronger and stronger, and better able to help you successfully reach your goals.
To build willpower, take on a challenge that requires you to do something you’d honestly rather not do. Give up high-fat snacks, do 100 sit-ups a day, stand up straight when you catch yourself slouching, try to learn a new skill. When you find yourself wanting to give in, give up, or just not bother — don’t. Start with just one activity, and make a plan for how you will deal with troubles when they occur ("If I have a craving for a snack, I will eat one piece of fresh or three pieces of dried fruit.") It will be hard in the beginning, but it will get easier, and that’s the whole point. As your strength grows, you can take on more challenges and step-up your self-control workout.
8. Don’t tempt fate. No matter how strong your willpower muscle becomes, it’s important to always respect the fact that it is limited, and if you overtax it you will temporarily run out of steam. Don’t try to take on two challenging tasks at once, if you can help it (like quitting smoking and dieting at the same time). And don’t put yourself in harm’s way — many people are overly-confident in their ability to resist temptation, and as a result they put themselves in situations where temptations abound. Successful people know not to make reaching a goal harder than it already is.
9. Focus on what you will do, not what you won’t do. Do you want to successfully lose weight, quit smoking, or put a lid on your bad temper? Then plan how you will replace bad habits with good ones, rather than focusing only on the bad habits themselves. Research on thought suppression (e.g., "Don’t think about white bears!") has shown that trying to avoid a thought makes it even more active in your mind. The same holds true when it comes to behavior — by trying not to engage in a bad habit, our habits get strengthened rather than broken.
If you want change your ways, ask yourself, What will I do instead? For example, if you are trying to gain control of your temper and stop flying off the handle, you might make a plan like "If I am starting to feel angry, then I will take three deep breaths to calm down." By using deep breathing as a replacement for giving in to your anger, your bad habit will get worn away over time until it disappears completely.
It is my hope that, after reading about the nine things successful people do differently, you have gained some insight into all the things you have been doing right all along. Even more important, I hope are able to identify the mistakes that have derailed you, and use that knowledge to your advantage from now on. Remember, you don’t need to become a different person to become a more successful one. It’s never what you are, but what you do.
Filed under: Career
Copyright: Taken from Ramit’s blog post
WEEK 3 RESULTS
“The short story – today I negotiated a work-from-home arrangement for 2 days per week from my full-time job, with no end date. My commute is 3 hours roundtrip per day, so this saves me 6 hours per week, which I can now spend with my wife and 1yr old daughter. Totally liberating, although it still hasn’t really hit me. Thanks to Ramit for the tips which helped me succeed at this. (and also to Tim Ferriss, I re-read the script in ‘Disappearing Act’ of 4HWW too)
The details –
I work at a large TBTF bank, managing a team of software developers. It’s review season, and I got my annual compensation communication last week, but by phone since I was on vacation. I was disappointed with the compensation (2% increase total from last year, despite ranking pretty well at 4 of 5). My goal: negotiate an increase in my “total compensation”. By the way, I know from research that I make a fair amount more than others in similar jobs, and my job is kinda cool, so I’m not really ready to run out the door.[RAMIT’S NOTE: Notice the amount of preparation Alex has put into his negotiation and the specificity of his goal. 85% of the work is done before you ever step foot in a room to interview or negotiate.]
Script –
Me: As I mentioned last week, I’m disappointed in my compensation this year, considering I performed well, and the bank did fairly well. [went through percentages last year, this year]. It would be one thing if I underperformed, but what really bothers me is the disconnect between performance and pay.
Boss: [checked my percentages, generally nodded, explained about bank performance and 'the way it works']
Me: This disconnect has really made my start to dislike my job. I felt this way last year, and hoped it would get better, but it hasn’t.[RAMIT’S NOTE: He’s expressing disappointment, not anger, and leading the conversation where he wants it to go. Predictably, the boss responds with a...]
Boss [look of concern]
Me: HOWEVER, I also understand your predicament. You have a lot of great performers which you’d like to pay well, but you are at the mercy of pre-determined money pools, and a company whose overall performance is out of your control, at the whim of markets and economies.
Boss [profuse nodding, almost smiling][RAMIT’S NOTE: What Alex just did was extremely sophisticated. He expressed disappointment, then re-framed the conversation to empathize with the boss’s situation. Notice how deeply he gets in his boss’s head -- he’s literally using the eaxct words his boss would use to describe his corporate shackles. When you are deeply in someone else’s head, you will see them irresistibly respond with nods, words like “EXACTLY,” and so on. And you are being ethical as you are simply describing their own situation, perhaps better than they could even articulate it. Alex is doing a masterful job.]
Me: So I’ve been thinking of ways out of this stalemate which don’t involve me leaving the company.
Boss: Oh well that is good, what are you thinking[RAMIT’S NOTE: This is the turning point in the conversation: The boss just essentially invited Alex to write his own ticket. But notice that it took weeks of thinking and planning to get to this point.]
Me: I’d like to propose working from home a few days a week on a regular basis. I am much more productive working from home, and the saved commute time would allow me to put in more hours without sacrificing work-life-balance. I could increase my performance, and also be happier with less commute, so it’s win-win. Of course I’d be in the office for meetings requiring my physical presence, and always available on cell.
Boss: Well that sounds ok, you don’t have to sell it to me. But how many days were you thinking?[RAMIT’S NOTE: “You don’t have to sell it to me.” That’s because he already successfully sold it with his research, top performance, and understanding of the situation. Negotiations don’t have to be a hard sell, which is precisely what Alex is demonstrating. The boss actually WANTS to give Alex his demands!]
Me: 3 days per week
Boss: That sounds like a little much, I’d feel much better about 2 days, which is less than half the time.
Me: Ok I think I can do 2 days.[RAMIT’S NOTE: Classic door-in-the-face technique.]
Boss: Ok good, let’s talk some more about your compensation numbers
Me: [blah blah not listening, huge grin on INSIDE, I can't believe he went for it]Tactics I used:
- Reviewed scripts of other similar situations, and picked key words to reuse
- Wrote out a loose script in advance
- Decided increasing pay was a non-starter at this point, so went for something else (tele-commuting)
- Decided 2 days would be great, so asked for 3 so I had something to give back
- Decided NOT to use the phrase “on a trial basis” on my wife’s recommendation, but instead keep it in my pocket. this was a good idea since I didn’t need it.
- Made a soft threat to quit to make the alternative seem less severe
- Showed I understand his side, and played to his desire to have happy employees and compensate them
- Practiced! I found a conference room 1 hour before to write my script and said it a few times out loud
- Timeboxing – I didn’t have a lot of time to work on this – total prep was 2 hours (15 mins at home night before, 45 mins on bus reading 4HWW & this post, 1 hour at office writing script & practicing). This made me focus, especially in that final hourResults, and why it’s good –
– even though it wasn’t dollars, 6 hours of my life back is worth a lot. also gives lots of flexibility to shift hours around. I increased my total compensation. actually it saves me $30 on commute per week also
- while I worked from home 2-3 times per month previously, a regular arrangement is unheard of, and 2 days/wk is absolutely crazy. Can’t believe I didn’t ask earlier.”
Filed under: Career
Copy of what’s posted at
http://www.freemoneyfinance.com/2010/11/career-insurance-insuring-your-most-valuable-asset.html
For the vast majority of people, their career is their most valuable financial asset. Nothing else they own is likely worth as much (several million dollars over a lifetime). And even if they do have something more valuable (like an investment portfolio), it was probably earned as a result of their career.
As with anything valuable, you need to take steps to protect your career. That’s why financial websites recommend life, health, and disability insurance — to protect/replace the value of your career in case you die, get sick, or are physically unable to work. Having some form of these insurances is generally wise for almost every worker. But there’s another form of insurance that’s equally essential.
This insurance is free, but it will take some work and planning. Its benefits go far beyond the time it takes to implement the steps involved. And in addition to increased income, this insurance may even give you more job satisfaction, less stress, and a longer life. Interested?
I’ll call it "Career Insurance" (creative name, huh?). This Career Insurance is not a product you can buy, but a series of actions you can proactively take to minimize the chance that your career will take a major hit.
These actions can help you avoid the following situations:
- Being fired or laid off. The negative impact of losing your job is not only loss of income but your career progress is halted. You lose valuable time which limits the compounding growth of your earnings. Plus, when you consider that many people have to take a step back career-wise when they finally do find a new position, you realize just how bad a firing or layoff can be.
- Long layoff time. Even taking steps to avoid firing and layoffs, they can still happen. If you are let go, you must focus on minimizing the time that your career is in limbo. The longer you are laid off, the longer your most valuable asset stagnates and the more likely you are to take a job that’s far below your previous level.
- Financial strain. This step doesn’t protect your career per se, but it minimizes the pain associated with losing a job. You’ll have less stress, more energy and extra time to focus on finding new work.
- Physically unable to work. No work = no pay. There are things you can do to prevent illness and injury as well as things you shouldn’t do to maintain good health.
You can protect yourself from these hazards and develop your own Career Insurance by taking the following steps:
Protection from Firing or Layoff
1. Make yourself more valuable/indispensible to your employer. Let’s face it, even in the worst environment imaginable, the ones who keep the ship afloat are the last ones fired from the crew. So deliver more than what’s expected for your position (and more than most or all others in your organization/department). In particular, if you can contribute to the organization’s bottom line on a regular basis by saving it money and/or growing revenue, you’re usually untouchable. Oh, and don’t forget to be likeable as well. Yes, producing jerks are still kept on staff, but they are fired before productive nice guys. 
2. Get a mentor. Having someone above you in the organization who can guide and direct you has many benefits. A mentor can help propel your career by making you more effective, help you accomplish more, and pave the way for promotions and raises. All of these are great reasons for having a mentor. But there are other benefits — Career Insurance benefits. A mentor can watch your back when firings and layoffs occur. He may put in a good report for you in key meetings. At the least, he might be able to give you advanced warnings as to when layoffs could be coming, so you can get a jump on finding a new job.
3. Network inside the company. In addition to having a mentor, you should develop good contacts throughout the company at various levels. Again, these can help protect you in troubled times. Once when my company was facing layoffs, I had another executive speak up on behalf of one of my employees because she had also worked with his department on a key project. In the end, his defense helped sway committee decisions and she was able to keep her job. In short, you never know how or when someone can help you, but the more people you have looking our for your best interests, the better off you are.
Protection to Minimize Layoff Time
1. Network to develop contacts outside your company. Networking is a key way to grow your career. One major benefit: it connects you with people who can assist you in finding new work. Statistics show that a majority of jobs are placed by networking, so the bigger your network, the better chance that you can use it to find a suitable job quickly. So work to broaden your contacts through lunch dates, seminars, trade shows, industry events, volunteer activities, social media, common interests, and more. And of course, a network doesn’t only work when you are out of work. It’s helpful when you’re employed and want to make a change too.
2. Refresh your resume. You should keep track of your work accomplishments on a regular basis — it’s part of a systematic way to get raises and promotions – so you’ll always have a handy list of what you’ve done and how you’ve performed. (BTW, having a system will make sure you don’t forget anything major.) These will allow you to develop an updated resume immediately if you’re let go. In addition, your list will allow you to be sure your resume is full of high-end accomplishments. Update your resume as quickly as possible and get it out to your network pronto.
3. Get an employment contract. While this won’t get you a job faster, it will basically extend your current income for a period of time. The ultimate in protection, an employment contract is usually held by top-level executives and other key personnel. But if you can obtain this status, you know that even if you’re let go, your company will have to pay your salary for the stipulated amount of time — usually six months or a year — even if they fire you. Usually this is more than enough time to find new employment without disrupting your career.
Protection to Minimize Financial Strain
1. Develop outside streams of income. If you get fired, one way to cushion the blow is to have income from other sources. It might not provide the level of earnings you’re used to, but SOME money coming in is certainly better than NO money coming in. Suggestions to bring in more money: develop a hobby as a business, start your own business on weekends or evenings (I like to referee soccer matches), and work on growing your investments (if you have savings/investments they can sometimes be reallocated to produce income.) Consider all the ways that you might be able to earn more money, select one or two that work for you, and start now in getting them developed. Even if you never need them in case of a job loss, the extra income will still come in handy.
2. Increase the amount in your emergency fund. A key reason for having an emergency fund is to provide for your needs in case you lose your job. And the less stable your job situtaion (or the more likely a layoff could be coming), the higher amount you need in an emergency fund. Almost everyone should have at least six months of living expenses saved up in case of a loss in income. If you’re in an uncertain industry, company, or position, work now to bump that up to give yourself protection comensurate with your risk.
Protection from Not Being Able to Work
1. Disability Insurance. Yes, this is a traditional insurance product, so maybe it shouldn’t be part of this post. But it’s also probably the most ignored insurance product on the market — and yet it protects your largest asset. You MUST get some sort of disability insurance coverage. Sometimes this will be provided through your employer, but many times the level of coverage is not adequate. Make sure any disability policy you have will replace at least 60% of your income and will kick in before your emergency fund runs dry.
2. Keep/get in good shape. If your body isn’t functioning fully, you can’t work to your full potential (which isn’t good for your job security.) So follow mom’s suggestions: eat properly, get plenty of rest, exercise, drink water, and keep stress as low as possible.
3. Take precautions against sickness. If you’re sick, you can’t work. At a minimum it will cost you valuable vacation time. And feeling poorly always negatively impacts your performance. So follow mom’s other set of instructions: wash your hands (especially during cold and flu season), take action at the first signs of sickness (drink fluids and get plenty of rest), seek medical help when needed, and "don’t smoke, drink, or chew or hang with those that do". By taking care of your body, you’ll not only be a better employee, you could also get the added benefit of prolonging your life.
Of course, no plan will work 100% of the time. Despite all of these precautions, the perfect storm could occur and sidetrack your career a bit. But Career Insurance will certainly help you weather the storm, minimize any damage, and ultimately move your career along. So get started today developing your own Career Insurance and ensure that your most valuable financial asset is protected the way it should be.
Filed under: Career, Development, Life, Management, Personal Development, Work
Good nuggets from a well written post
You’ll always find yourself in situations where you’re never “paid back” for what you give. But even in those cases, I find a surprising result – there’s usually a positive payback, but it’s really indirect.
I can associate very well to this, as in my current NGPA project, I am not well rewarded with respect to money. However, I go beyond my specified duties and make/made sure people using it had no blocking issues / concerns and that earned me a very nice name and trust in the organization.
So, if you can help someone out without disadvantaging yourself, do it. That means sharing ideas, making connections, and doing little tasks that don’t eat up tons of your time and energy. Don’t worry about the return – if you do it often enough and with enough quality and value, the return will take care of itself.
More than anything in return it makes you a better person. Relevant comment …
I believe, aside from the paybacks, that habitually helping other people helps you by making you a better person. When you help others you become more patient, generous and selfless. When you only look out for yourself you tend to become narcissistic. People who are completely focused on themselves tend to self-destruct, sooner or later.
I’d want to go back 50 years. I’d tell myself: “Think very very carefully about the choices you make. Write down what you want when you’re my current age. (Hint: You didn’t get it because of those choices.) And, remember that in the future, the “Shouldas, wouldas, and couldas” will really annoy the ever loving out of you. Looking back you’ll say SWC!”
Success for the current generation IMHO is: (1) ruthless financial discipline — no bad debt; (2) a life long interest in learning — education — a degree — they can’t take it away from you; (3) a white collar job in order to save big bucks; (4) a blue collar skill for hard times — never saw a poor plumber; (5) one or more internet based businesses — your store is always open; (6) a free time hobby that generates income; and (7) a large will-maintained network of people who can “help” you.
Work exceptionally hard and step up from day one, despite being junior. In the first three to four months that you’re in a job, you can create positive or negative momentum. I got to Merrill already hungry to prove myself and exceeded expectations; from that point on I got staffed on the better assignments and was given the opportunity to move to London. Hank’s advice has always stayed with me. It’s key to starting any new job because you have a few months to make a first impression, and a finite window of time to create professional momentum and start building a brand for yourself. – Sukhinder Singh Cassidy
The advice that sticks out I got from John Doerr, who in 2001 said, "My advice to you is to have a coach." The coach he said I should have is Bill Campbell. I initially resented the advice, because after all, I was a CEO. I was pretty experienced. Why would I need a coach? Am I doing something wrong? My argument was, How could a coach advise me if I’m the best person in the world at this? But that’s not what a coach does. The coach doesn’t have to play the sport as well as you do. They have to watch you and get you to be your best. In the business context a coach is not a repetitious coach. A coach is somebody who looks at something with another set of eyes, describes it to you in [his] words, and discusses how to approach the problem. — Eric Schmidt
There was a brand-new second lieutenant who was very ambitious and wanted to be a general. So one night at the officer’s club the young officer spotted this old general sitting at the bar. So he went up and said, "How do I become a general?" And the old general answered, "Son, you’ve got to work like a dog. You’ve got to have moral and physical courage. There may be days you’re tired, but you must never show fatigue. You’ll be afraid, but you can never show fear. You must always be the leader." The young officer was so excited by this advice. "Thank you, sir," he said, "so is this how I become a general?" "No," said the general, "that’s how you become a first lieutenant, and then you keep doing it over and over and over." Throughout my career, I’ve always tried to do my best today, think about tomorrow, and maybe dream a bit about the future. But doing your best in the present has to be the rule. You won’t become a general unless you become a good first lieutenant. — Colin Powell
If you are really effective at what you do, 95% of the things said about you will be negative. Keep your head on straight, don’t get emotional, take the heat, and just make sure your clients are smiling. – Scott Boras
Good one:
Lloyd Blankfein: Empower a subordinate
Age: 54
Chairman and CEO, Goldman SachsWhen I was put in charge of sales and trading at Goldman’s commodities unit [in 1984], it was a big deal for me. My first month on the job, things started going badly in the P&L. When I went in to my boss for help, he asked, "What do you think we should do here?" I wanted to sound totally in control, so I went right into this Chuck Yeager voice — you know, The Right Stuff. I used my most fake-confident voice, and I gave it my best shot. He said, "Okay, that’s a good idea." It was smart of him to ask my opinion instead of telling me what to do. He knew that if my plan worked, I’d feel more confident. If it didn’t work, the pressure on me would ease because he had endorsed my idea. Just as I was walking out of his office, he said, "Oh, just one more thing. Why don’t you walk to the men’s room and throw cold water on your face? You’re looking green." So I learned two things: First, it’s good to solicit your people’s opinions before you give them yours. And second, your people will be very influenced by how you carry yourself under stress.
